thirty happened

As always, I read old blogs posted near old birthdays to see what i was thinking then and how I grew or stayed the same. I grabbed one from a few years back and had to laugh at how the rut of life is deep sometimes.

This was from turning 28 and includes 27 tidbits.

To quote myself if I may "A lot is to be accomplished during the year of 27. As usual I have an unrealistic to do list that will never be finished. I will finish school - finally, get a job, become a participating adult in society and move again to accommodate such job. These are the biggies for 27. The small list goes on for days. I am going to try to take this year more slowly and to not stress the small stuff. I am a stressor - so that will be a huge accomplishment for 27." ~ S. Ryan (27 and 1 week)

So >>>>> what was done, and what can be checked off...hmmmmm. I guess I did accomplish a lot. I am another degree poorer. I did finish school, but then I started again. I tend to do that. I have yet to become much of a participating adult and I have yet to move. I happy about all of it at the moment. I still stress over the small stuff, but I did work towards solutions. I had the Summer of Sandee, I am procrastinating less (still a lot), I started Yoga and I am running. Healthy lifestyle choices.

I am optimistic that 28 will bring a close to school or close to it depending on thesis dates. I will be done my part - lets go with that. I can only assume a job has to be in one of these birthdays futures, so I will again swing for that. I see 28 being as year of continued healthy choices, mentally and physically.

Well I am now on 30, still in school, still unemployed and still trying to find a way to include healthy life style choices. I let go of running and yoga and miss them both. I did start a pottery class and that has been a saver some days.
I am not making plans for this year. I am not setting goals to be anywhere or done anything. I am just going to ride this year out.


I was introduced to the idea of Saturn Return.
Many of us approach our thirtieth birthdays with anxiety, even dread. We start looking for gray hairs and paying attention to ads for wrinkle creams. We question whether we are climbing the career ladder quickly enough. We hear the biological clock ticking loudly and worry that soon we will be too old to bear children.

Astrologers call the period between ages twenty-eight and thirty "Saturn Return." That's because it's the first time the planet Saturn completes its cycle through your birth chart and returns to the spot it occupied when you were born. Internationally respected astrologer Rob Hand calls Saturn Return "one of the most important times in your life. . . a time of endings and new beginnings."

For most of us, ending a phase of life that is familiar and embarking on one that is new and untried is unsettling, even painful. Few people describe Saturn Return as a pleasant period. While undergoing your Saturn Return you may find yourself turning inward and reflecting on your individual destiny. You examine your true needs and desires and the role you want to play on the world's stage. You may feel lonely and alienated from those around you, while family and friends think you are shutting them out. But this is a necessary period of consolidation, when you must retreat from the distractions of the outer world and focus on yourself at your most fundamental level. The Saturn Return is every individuals search for the Holy Grail.

http://www.newage-directory.com/saturn.html

I like the idea that there are reasons behind my feelings, it is comforting